Cry Abba

When we cry "Abba" it is the Spirit Himself. This is a great mystery. For Saint Thomas this expresses the most profound and the most intimate experience of our Christian life, the summit of mystical life.

When under the breath of the Holy Spirit we can say with Jesus "Abba, Father" - not only with our lips but in the silence of love, as a cry - we have a divine experience of our sonship, of our birth to divine life. We enter into this eternal generation of the Word of God (the Logos), of the Son who is in the bosom of the Father (here we know this from the Gospel of John). We are grasped by Christ, seized by Him (this is the proper moment of our Christian life) so that He might take possession of our inmost heart, of our will, so that we might have the same sentiments as Him, the same cry as Him, and say in all truth, "Abba, Pater."

It is this one must consider of fatherhood. Fatherhood is at the point of departure and at the term because it is going to remain eternally; this cry - "Abba" - will remain eternally. In heaven we will eternally, unceasingly say "Father," and we will say it in the light of the beatific vision, gazing upon the Father and understanding that there is nothing greater than Him. And we will say "Father" in the light that Jesus gives us, this light that comes from the Son, "Light from Light." We will say it in His light, and we will discover eternally what we glimpse already as of this earth, in the obscurity of faith and in love. We will discover eternally that there is nothing greater than saying "Father." We will discover that the eternal Word, the Son, who is in the bosom of the Father, also eternally gazes upon the Father and that the Holy Spirit also eternally gazes upon the Father and that the Father is eternally their source of light and love. We will then understand that the mystery of the Incarnation is there to reveal the Father to us. We will understand that the Holy Spirit is given to us that we might discover the Father and that all Scripture is given to us that we might understand the Father's gaze of love upon us and His attraction of love. All of Scripture is there that we might enter into this attraction of love. In heaven we will understand this in full light; here, on earth, it is in the obscurity of faith. But we know that saying "Father" is truly what is greatest. If Jesus is the Bridegroom, it is so that we might be able to say, with Him, "Father." If the Holy Spirit is given to us and envelops us with His love, it is so that, with Him, we might be able to say "Father."

It is for this reason that in our orison - our silent, interior prayer - we must constantly come back to this. We must ask the Holy Spirit to give us this experience. We must ask Him to help us grasp this filiation of love which we find in ourselves. We are in it. We must ask the Holy Spirit to enlighten us and to let us understand that this is the essential thing in our Christian life and that, in the end, this is our Christian life. It is from this filiation of love and in it that all the rest is enlightened. We must ask for this, for it is a grace. The Holy Spirit wants to give us this experience of love. He wants us to understand this more deeply than we have understood it until now. He wants to lead us into this mystery of filiation so that we might in all truth say "Father," in Church and also in listening to preaching. I am obliged to speak to you; you have the privilege of being silent; it is more contemplative. You can contemplate and you must contemplate and you must contemplate in saying "Father." You must enter into this contemplation of love understanding that He is there and that He gives you His light and He communicates to you His love so that you might be able to look upon Him in all truth and say, "Abba, Father, Pater."

Don't Mess With My Pop

Or I'll give you my patented imitation Clint Eastwood intimidator-eye:

Aletheia's First Blessings

I think the pics speak for themselves.

Thank you Abouna.At our Maronite Catholic parish:

Aletheia's Nickname

A dear friend reminded me today of our "official" nickname for Aletheia.

Skull Crusher!
(Rowr.)

Yeah - she's tough.
Imitation bunny-ears are intimidating . . .

She's VERY intimidating:
She has her head buried in my chest as I type right now.

What you miss with mere pictures,
and I wish I could share,
are all the cute little noises she makes.
I just cannot get enough of smelling her and listening to her.

Aletheia Sharbel Liu - Name in Icons

Aletheia:

Sharbel:

Aletheia Sharbel Liu - Day 3

I ache when I look at her:


A yawn from his daughter is sufficient to break a father's heart.

Aletheia Sharbel Liu - Day 3

I like to think antiquing this pic makes it look more authentic.
Whatever: those eyes indicate trouble for me.

Aletheia Sharbel Liu - Day 3

Day 3, Lesson 2: Though a father-to-be will be told roughly 67 times before it actually happens, he will not really understand that leaving a child exposed to cool air when changing her diaper is not particularly wise, until he unwisely leaves his child exposed to cool air when changing her diaper.

Lesson 2, Corollary 1: A new father's wisdom increases in proportion to his child's ability to pee in defiance of a system's gravitational potential energy.

Lesson 2, Corollary 2: A newborn who is breastfeeding well will rarely just pee.

Lesson 2, Corollary 2 led to Aletheia's second bath tonight.
Her first is pictured below:
You don't want to see why she needed her second.

Aletheia Sharbel Liu - Day 1

Day 1, Lesson 1: It is not good for a new father to cause his daughter to get a fever. The doctor and staff referred to it as "an environmental fever." It didn't take long to realize that "environmental fever" is polite provider-speak for: "new father induced fever because he overreacted to an apparent chill (quivering chin; unrelated to temperature), in his daughter by wrapping her in a onesie, socks for hands and feet, cap, two swaddling blankets, and two bed blankets - for eight hours."

Impressive.

Photos forthcoming.

Fr. Cantalamessa on the Joy of Fatherhood

Thanks to Zenit: A translation of a commentary by the Pontifical Household preacher, Capuchin Father Raniero Cantalamessa, on the readings from this Sunday's liturgy.

* * *

His father ran out to meet him
24th Sunday in Ordinary Time
Exodus 32:7-11, 13-14; 1 Timothy 1:12-17; Luke 15:1-32

In this Sunday's liturgy the entire 15th chapter of Luke's Gospel is read. The chapter contains the three "mercy parables": the lost sheep, the lost coin, and the prodigal son.

"A man had two sons": Anyone who has even the most minimal familiarity with the Gospel on hearing these five words will immediately exclaim, "the parable of the prodigal son!"

On other occasions I have focused on the spiritual significance of the parable; this time I would like to consider an aspect that has received little attention, but which is very relevant at this moment and close to life. At the bottom of the parable is simply the story of a reconciliation between father and son, and we all know that such a reconciliation is essential to the happiness of fathers and children.

Who knows why literature, art, theater and advertisements all concentrate on a single human relationship: the erotic one between man and woman, between husband and wife? It would seem that this is the only thing in life.

Advertisements and the cinema do nothing else but cook up the same dish using a thousand sauces. But we leave another human relationship, that is just as universal and vital, unexplored, one that is another great source of the joy of life: the relationship between father and children, the joy of paternity.

The only piece of literature that really deals with this theme is Franz Kafka's letter to his father. Ivan Sergeyevich Turgenev's famous novel "Fathers and Sons" does not actually treat of the relationship between natural fathers and children but between different generations.

If we serenely and objectively look into the human heart we will find that, in the majority of cases, a good, understanding, and untroubled relationship with his children is, for a mature, adult man, no less important and fulfilling than the relationship between a man and a woman. We know how important this relationship is for both sons and daughters and the tremendous void that is left by its disintegration.

As cancer usually attacks the most delicate organs in men and women, so also does the destructive power of sin and evil attack the most vital relationships in human existence. There is nothing worse in the relationship between a man and a woman than abuse, exploitation and violence, and there is nothing that is exposed to deformation like the relationship between fathers and children: authoritarianism, paternalism, rebellion, rejection, lack of communication.

We should not generalize. There are beautiful relationships between fathers and children and I myself have known various ones. We know, however, that there are also more numerous negative cases and difficult relationships between fathers and children. In the prophet Isaiah we read this exclamation of God: "I raised and reared these children but they have rebelled against me" (Isaiah 1:2). I believe that many fathers today know from experience what these words mean.

The suffering is reciprocal; it is not like the parable in which the fault is entirely the son's. There are fathers whose most profound suffering in life is being rejected or even despised by their children. And there are children whose most profound and unadmitted suffering is to feel misunderstood, to not be esteemed, to be rejected by their father.

I have focused on the human and existential implications of the parable of the prodigal son. But we are not only dealing with this, that is, with the amelioration of the quality of life in this world.

The undertaking of a great reconciliation between fathers and children and a profound healing of their relationship is something that is important for a new evangelization. We know how much the relationship with an earthly father can influence, positively or negatively, one's relationship with the heavenly Father and thus the Christian life as well.

When the precursor, John the Baptist, was born the angel said that one of his tasks would be "to turn the hearts of the fathers to the children and the hearts of the children to the fathers" [cf. Luke 1:17]. Today this is a task that is more important than ever.

Dinnertime Without Dad

Don’t go to single-parent households for sparkling mealtime repartee. According to a team of researchers at Tufts University, dinnertime conversation in such households offers much less mental stimulation to the children reared there than does the dinnertime conversation in intact two-parent homes. After observing dinnertime conversations in 82 homes (35 two-parent households, 36 mother-only households, and 9 father-only homes), the researchers conclude (in the opaque language of the social sciences) that "family structure does impact interactional verbal process."

More specifically, "the absent adult in single-parent dinners was never fully compensated for, and the interaction which resulted was different." Simply put, "there was less speaking at these dinners," and in what speaking did take place, "the parental input…was less and the children’s input was more…. Children in single-parent homes accounted for more than half of the talk turns that occurred."

The Tufts team stresses the importance of "the family dinnertime as a natural setting for important communication of spoken language, and perhaps also values and attitudes," noting the potentially "beneficial effects on the development of children" in hearing adult conversation in such a setting. Children growing up hearing both parents at the dinner table will naturally enjoy these beneficial effects more fully than peers growing up hearing only one, while the greatest benefit may accrue to "children growing up in homes which [also] include grandparents...[who] have the potential of enriching the child’s growth through more adult contribution to dialogue."

(Source: Elizabeth L. Brach, Kathleen A. Camara, and Robert F. Houser, Jr., "Patterns of Dinnertime Interaction in Divorced and Non-Divorced Families," Journal of Divorce & Remarriage 32[2000]: 125-139.)

The Essence of Fatherhood

Thanks to the work of the National Fatherhood Initiative, the public has become more aware of the importance of fatherhood in the lives of children, especially boys. Yet the greater challenge may be persuading policy makers to see how responsible fatherhood and marriage go hand in hand. As a new study by researchers at the Urban Institute and Child Trends documents, marriage and intact families significantly boost the effects of involved fatherhood in protecting teens against juvenile delinquency and substance abuse.

The researchers crunched data from National Longitudinal Survey of Youth that involved three rounds of surveys between 1997 and 1999 of a cohort of teens (average age between 14 and 15) who were disproportionately from minority (black and Hispanic) and broken homes. Thirty seven (37) percent had engaged in a delinquent activity during the observation period; 45 percent had used substances.

In their multivariate analysis, the researchers found that while the effects are small or modest, higher levels of father involvement in the emotional and behavioral lives of their children consistently lowers teen risks of transitioning into delinquent behavior and substance use (odds ratio 0.99 for both dependent variables). The correlation remained significant even after controlling for other covariables, including mother involvement, other father and mother characteristics, immigration status, and socioeconomic status.

Yet "living in an intact family" exerted a greater independent effect in lowering teen risk behaviors (odds ratios: 0.81 for first delinquency, 0.83 for first substance use). In addition, living with a larger number of siblings also lowered a teen first's substance use (Odds Ratio, 0.89; p<.001).

Using models that included "two-way interaction terms," the researchers measured the strength of father involvement in protecting teens from risk behaviors relative to family structure and gender. As expected, the effects of father involvement in lowering risks of both behaviors (and net of other factors) were significantly stronger for teens from intact families than teens from non-intact families, as well as for sons than daughters.

While the researchers do not press the point, their findings suggest that responsible fatherhood may not mean much unless fathers marry—or stay married to—the mothers of their children.

(Source: Jacinta Bronte-Tinkew et al., "The Influence of Father Involvement on Youth Risk Behaviors Among Adolescents: A Comparison of Native-Born and Immigrant Families," Social Science Research 35 [March 2006]: 181-209.)